How To Love Your Own Company

Hi, how are you doing on this lockdown eve? I hope you are keeping well, staying safe, and looking after yourself and others through this continuous unusual time. I've wanted to write this blog post for a while now, but have struggled with the subject matter myself. Honestly, I didn't write this blog just to guide, inspire and help you guys, but writing this blog post was also a little bit of a sense of catharsis, and a therapy session with myself. And now with lockdown 2 coming in full flow, I think this will resonate (and help) a lot of people.

Recently I became single after the end of a loving long-term relationship. A change in your life, when you would normally go out with your friends, have a couple of cocktails and have fun. However, with the everchanging restrictions of being unable to socialise with my friends, I have felt very lonely and unmotivated. And I know for a fact, I have not been the only one who has sensed their mental health deteriorating through the last couple of months and have been struggling to an extent.

Just a couple of reminders:

  • It is ok to not be ok.

  • It is ok to cry. Show your emotions.

  • Being alone doesn't mean you are lonely.

  • You are your own best friend.

  • Talk to others if you need to.

Throughout this time, I have had to learn a way to love my own company, and I am still doing so, it is something you need to continue to practice. Therefore, I wanted to share a couple of things to do by yourself... Here goes.

Reorganise your Bedroom

Something that my mum taught me ever since I was a child was to make my bed every morning when I woke up, to start your day in the right mindset. I find when you have a messy area surrounding you, like a messy bedroom, a messy work area, the result can make you feel messy in your head, and this can feel like a dark cloud on your shoulders. Put on your favourite HAPPY album, dance around and organise your clothes, your cupboards, your toiletries and it will benefit your mental state and help pass a Saturday afternoon alone.

Commit To A (Couple) Of Netflix Series

Spending time with yourself and committing to a programme, where you spend a certain time a week, you, yourself and Netflix is another example of learning to love your own company. I also find watching some crappy TV distracts yourself from what is going on around you, and the negativity in your mind.

Go Outside

I must mention this every self-love based blog post, but honestly, exercise it is the best way to clear your mind. Going outside, for a walk, and being surrounded by nature is the perfect start to the morning. Unfortunately, due to recent physical difficulties: having a split nerve in my spine, and a strained calf muscle, going for walks and exercising are a distant memory, and this has affected my mood, as normally I would go for a walk every day for around 45 minutes to an hour. But do it, an hour of your day, just you and nature.

Start a New Passion Project

Forget about your job, your degree, any work that is making you want to rip your hair out, oh yes I know. Starting a passion project is the perfect use of your own time and a way to be one with your company. This time in lockdown, or by yourself is an opportunity to learn a new hobby, refine a skill, and try something completely new. Time to let your creative flag fly. This could including drawing, baking, writing, playing an instrument, blogging, online gaming, singing, learning to knit, sushi making...the list goes on. The result of this 'project' will be the first-place reward for the time you spent with your own company.

Cook a New Recipe

I think when you feel sad, or down, or lonely. You want (and rely on) on comfort food, like their your friend or partner. A Fish and Chips takeaway has become my safe haven. I know how hard it is to forget about your physical health when your mental health is lacking. I went from drinking smoothies and eating salads, and being active all day, to not washing, drinking prosecco and eating too many carbs, and struggling to get out of bed. Go on and challenge yourself to become the next Jamie Oliver or Mary Berry. If I can eat greens so can you.

Lose Yourself In a Book

I love love love reading, it is one of my favourite past times. When we were in lockdown I read every day, exploring a different book every week. Since the first lockdown, I initially became busier with my university studies and socialising with my friends. Now, in Lockdown 2, I am taking this opportunity to reintroduce reading into my day, even if it is just for 30 minutes. It is a good way to just be by yourself. Grab a brew, turn off your phone, and lose yourself.

Have a Pamper Night

I feel like everyone says this is something you must do once you're relationship ends, but if it is common knowledge then it *must* work, right? Since the last month I have been talking to wellbeing therapist, and her advice was to have a soak in a bubble bath, treat myself to a face mask, light a candle, watch a good comedy film (no romance films, or I'd cry) and eat a whole pot of Cookie Dough Ice Cream from Ben & Jerrys.

Please remember this is just a lighthearted example of self-care, and remember to say no to things you don't want in your life, have time off your phone and remind yourself you are loved.

And breathe...You can make it through this lockdown, you've done it before, you can do it again. I believe in you. I hope this inspires you to learn to love your own company and at least inspires you with new and creative ideas to get up to in the next month or so, do what you love. Thank you for reading, and if you are ever wanting a chat- I am here.

See you soon, Love Mols x